She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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