hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
