I wanna bring you to show and tell
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
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