kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
