Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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