Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Randomize
