she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
