Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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