well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
