we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize
