sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
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