So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
it's like heaven, but drunker
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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