Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize