im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Randomize
