dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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