1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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