Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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