she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
