im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Randomize
