I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
