Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
