yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
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