you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
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