If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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