i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
