i can't believe i had my finger in that
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
birth control should be required to get into college
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
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