I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Randomize
