You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize
