He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
