I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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