Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
