So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
