I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
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