Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
