At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
