Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
