you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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