I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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