Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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