It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
