good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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