seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
