He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
