Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Randomize
