You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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