He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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