the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I need water and some morals
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Randomize
