wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Randomize
