I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
