Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Randomize
